Yahoo´s telecommuting issues

In the wake of the recent Yahoo controversy, I read this blog post by Penelope Trunk that gave me a huge wake up call.  I´ve already been feeling the pressure of the new job -- people in this job spend way more hours at the job than what I´m used to from my previous job and it´s been making me feel super guilty with the kids at home.  At the same time I don´t even feel like I´m spending enough time at work because the learning curve is so huge and I should be spending a ton more hours to really understand what´s going on and to be at par with co-workers and managers.  So the constant work life balance struggle was starting to tug at me again. It´s also been a shock to my system just because I had something in my previous job that I took for granted that apparently isn´t as common as I would´ve initially thought.  Lots of people around me who wanted the same things for their work-life balance, they wanted to get ahead but also be there for their kids. So I keep crying uncle and thinking it´s not fair, I had it before, what the heck happened that I lost it so badly!?

Now, I don´t quite want to quit and go home and spend 24 hours with the kids, but I also don´t want to put in as many hours as I´m expected to and never be home for them.  So I have to come to terms with what Penelope Trunk is saying...I´m not willing to give up everything for the career.  If that means I will not be viewed as a top performer and I wont be on anyone´s fast track list I guess that´s a consequence I´m willing to live with. I guess it´s better that I know that now so that I´m not playing "victim" later on when I get frustrated by being passed over for a promotion because some 20 year old who puts in 80 hour works week got it instead of me.  Because I WANT those two hours at night with my kids before putting them to bed (on most nights anyway!).  Because I want to be there for them for their important school activities.  I want to work, but I dont want to give up everything for my career.  I´ve always considered myself to be super hard working and dedicated to my job -- but if prioritizing kids for two hours a day and on weekends sends a huge red flag to my manager that I can´t or shouldn´t make it to the top -- then so be it. 

I guess it´s time I own up to the reality that I can´t have it all.  It´s time we ALL own up to that reality.  I think we´ve been fooling ourselves for way too long.  The point is we need to be OK with the choices that we make for ourselves and not feel guilty about it; not feel guilty when you´re not there for your kids and not feel guilty when you´re not at work.  I´m not quite there yet. But the Yahoo situation has given me a bit of a wake up call and I will try to have this choice that I MYSELF HAVE MADE front and center whenever I´m feeling the tug and pull of work-life "unbalance", which is a lot these days.