Sex and the City

I'm sitting in the movie theatre with a baby stuck to my boob which is already odd to begin with. What seems even more odd is that my sister has had the brilliant idea of sneaking in a bottle of wine to the movie theatre and has given each of us a little styrofoam cup to drink it from. Now put the picture together of a breastfeeding mom with a styrofoam cup of wine and you've really got a strange picture at hand. We may not have dressed up to the nines for the ocassion, but that's a moment I will never forget.

We BARELY made it to the movie on time, and I was so tired (which is my neverending state these days) that I almost wanted to not go to the movie. Getting my daughter and nephew with my brother in law into the movie theatre next to us to see Kung Fu Panda was the only thing we could think of to get away, but getting everyone to the movie theatre was no small feat.

Three minutes later I'm being "Carried away" by the fashion and the drama. Two and a half hours later I'm sobbing like a baby. We have a whole discussion about how unrealistic the movie is in portraying life as we know it, but I look beyond all that. Yes the storyline was pretty unrealistic (when hasn't it been?!) but beyond that I just can't deal with the emotions it has stirred up with me. I'm sad for having lost the past, sad for being away from my friends and being painfully reminded during the movie how different life can be when you've got friends near you, how often times having friends is the most important thing in life, definitely beyond guys, and sometimes even beyond babies. I also get a little bit of wake up call about how important it is to keep the fire burning with your partner. I've heard it a million times but amidst a neverending series of sleepless nights and crazy days, in which I have to remember to wash my hair and shave my legs, who has time to think about your romantic life? But that's another thing I have to try to work on, just pile it on to the "to do" list...it's so wrong of me to put it that way (I guess I'm a Miranda in that respect) but what else are you supossed to do? This blog entry is about friends and dammit that's the way it shall stay.

Speaking of which, I'm thankful that I am able to watch the movie with two of the best friends I have - Mara and my sister Geraldine. But at the same time I'm even more saddened by the fact that spending time with them is a rare treat instead of something I can do every day. I hug my baby and cry even more. Not knowing how I ended up where I am, not knowing where it is I want to go. Only knowing that at that very moment I have friends and family, and don't wan to let go...EVER. Mara comes out saying she wants a Big, I come out saying "I just want my friends". That's another great thing about our friendship, we can have a totally different perspective on the same subject, but we always accept and embrace the other person's point of view.

Anyway, I miss the days of having friends around all the time, of being able to go for a drink whenever one of us had a rough day at work or at home. I can barely type this blog entry since the tears start flowing just thinking about it. I hope we can all be together again soon. I know, I've LEARNED that it'll never be like it used to be 5 years ago, but that doesn't mean we have to be so damn far away all the time. I decide we must find Mara her Big, because the only way we'll all be able to be together again even for a little while is if she decides to tie the knot! So raise your styrofoam cup and here's to both of our wishes coming true...

I MISS YOU GUYS, EVERY DAY.