First world problems

I find myself revisiting the past a lot these days. Maybe because of the book I just finished reading (A Night Train to Lisbon), or it may be that my daughter is now going through stages that I remember going through. It's been a rough weekend at home. I've been "bad cop, bad cop" for most of the weekend. We had a sleep over gone amuck on Friday and I'm still reeling from it. These girls are absolutely nice, these girls were pleasant and treated my kids well and even played with my son, which for sleepover scorecards earns most kids A++. But I don't know, they're just spoiled. On top of that they're parents are likely going through a divorce and I find myself hearing those dreaded punches against one parent or another ("My mom is the worst, she's got a boyfriend"). I don't know what's going on but there's something there that just says "I've had it easy my whole life and I don't even know it". Until maybe now that they have to face a difficult life event. This morning after one of them (for which I had made pancakes she requested which she later on didn't eat), goes, "where are the nannies?" and leaves the refrigerator door completely ajar, I kinda lost it. I know, I know, everyone out there reading this is going "boo hoo, I don't have a weekend nanny". But believe me, the only reason why I have a nanny was so I could work full time because school schedules are completely crazy here. I am not the nanny kind (well except for the fact that they can cook well and I can't) and I don't want my kids to grow up being the nanny kind, thinking that everything is done for them and they don't have to worry about anything. My husband and I go through many an argument over this when I am trying to teach the kids to clean up after themselves. As I said I only got my nanny out of necessity but of course I can't be hypocritical and say I don't appreciate her presence when I'm "up to here" with the kids and it's not even dinner time (problems of a mom who's not working these days). But yet I also find myself thinking very differently from the non-working mother who has two nannies 24/7. Self-righteous? Probably, but that's just the way I feel and I apologize if I offend anyone. I just have a complete repulsion against spoiled brats, probably because I didn't come from money and never had anything easy. I just keep thinking, at this age I was learning the HARD way that I needed to be good or else. At this age my parents were already separated (if memory serves me right divorced, or I am re-writing history for my own benefit?) and I was already learning the hard truth that your mom has to be independent because GOD FORBID one day she might need to be. Plain and simple. If you don't work outside the home, when shit hits the fan YOU hit the fan too. Not that I'm ever planning on getting divorced but that need for independence is just at the very core of who I am. And along with that need for independence I learned really quick that if I didn't help Mom keep the house in order I was in deep shit. So I see these kids who just make a mess wherever they go (as normal kids might do) or who don't value the material things they have as hard-earned (as normal kids might do) and it drives me up the wall because I learned at such an early age that what we had was BLOOD SWEAT AND TEARS and we better be thankful for it and take care of it or else. If I am re-writing history for my own self-righteous pontificating, then I hope my memory is completely shattered because I don't look forward to the things I'll "remember" when my daughter is 13. Believe me, those days are not worth revisiting! Or are they? I remember when I lived in the US the big "gap" was between working moms and not working moms, I feel that now living here it has become "the working mom with nanny (or nannies)" vs. "the non-working mom with nanny (or nannies)". I guess that's truly a first world problem. And I have no interest in joining the battle, I just want my kids growing up being responsible, aware, helpful kids who can help Mom out whenever she needs it and who can be independent when the time comes. Poor Gabi I think learned her lesson the hard way (although I think she'll probably forget after a few days). I had her clean up most of the mess her friends made after we got back from the beach. I said "maybe next time if you tell your friends YOU are the one who's gonna end up cleaning after them if they make a mess they will be more considerate". Or maybe it'll dissuade Gabi from having any more sleepovers because she knows what she's in for if she makes a mess! Ha ha, fat chance most likely.